{"id":28588,"date":"2019-11-19T09:00:14","date_gmt":"2019-11-19T14:00:14","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/mommybites.com\/newyork\/?p=28588"},"modified":"2020-09-10T16:11:42","modified_gmt":"2020-09-10T21:11:42","slug":"how-to-get-out-the-door-quickly-and-without-conflict","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mommybites.com\/newyork\/how-to-get-out-the-door-quickly-and-without-conflict\/","title":{"rendered":"This Is How to Leave the House Quickly without Your Kid Freaking Out"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"get<\/p>\n

When my kids are doing something important like entertaining themselves (play is a child\u2019s MOST important job) and I need to ask them to get ready to leave (i.e. go to the loo and get their shoes and coats on) it\u2019s not uncommon for me to hear something like \u201cNOOOO! I don\u2019t wanna go right now!!!\u201d<\/p>\n

This often progresses into a battle of wills which ends poorly with either one or both of us crying and yelling. I don\u2019t enjoy confrontation, especially with a child, but I also don\u2019t like being late.<\/p>\n

From this conflict was born \u201cThe Exit Strategy.\u201d<\/strong><\/h2>\n

My kids, like most, are clever and they know when someone is trying to pull a fast one on them. Consequently, my plan had to be stealthy! I started implementing this with my children when they were around 2 years old and were able to lose themselves in play.<\/p>\n

If at any point in this process your child starts screaming\/crying\/pitching a fit… abort mission. Continuing may inadvertently reinforce the wrong behaviors. Children under 3 will respond better with a shorter time (1-5 minutes) because of how they experience time and their cognitive understanding of time at this age. Whereas children age 3+ might need 5-10 minutes to finish up their activity due to longer attention spans\/focus. etc.<\/p>\n

Kids love feeling in control (who doesn\u2019t?) and finding ways to offer them chances to feel in control while also adding some responsibility is a win-win. All I had to do was re-frame the exit strategy and provide consistent rules and structure when doing so.<\/p>\n

Read Next | Hire a Babysitter Now<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n

Essentially, what I did was shift my perspective about the power struggle.<\/strong><\/h2>\n

I re-framed it with some rules that will allow time flexibility for the children (let\u2019s be honest, sometimes we all just need a few extra minutes to finish up what we\u2019re doing), yet continued progression toward getting out of the house without tears. This is also teaching your child that you respect their work\/space and individuality.<\/p>\n

How YOU can get out the door without power struggles at home<\/strong><\/h2>\n

(Note: Plan ahead! You will need a maximum of 20 minutes)<\/p>\n

1. GIVE A HEADS-UP<\/h3>\n

Be aware of your time frame and when you need to leave giving your child(ren) a minimum of 5-10 minutes before you need them to stop playing with their toys and begin the exit routine. Any longer than that and they will not feel the time limit.<\/p>\n

2. CHECK-IN<\/h3>\n

Often, there are a few minutes here or there to spare when heading out: be aware of how much time you have. Once the five-minute warning is up and IF your child starts to argue after you tell them \u201clet\u2019s go, it\u2019s time\u201d you have 2 options:<\/p>\n