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    Categories: Moms

Parenting and The Blame Game

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    Hi Everyone!

    I was somewhat prepared for the emotional extremes of new motherhood and yet was completely flabbergasted that these emotional extremes would also affect and be affected by my marriage!  I have known my husband since we were both 18 years old and therefore was so surprised at the strain having children placed on our marriage.  Other than all the expected reasons (hormones, sleep deprivation, feeling overwhelmed, differing parenting styles, etc.) motherhood rocked my marriage for one main reason.

    I couldn’t be mad at my baby for not sleeping, not latching on, no eating, crying and all those other normal stressful baby traits.  So when I didn’t have it in me to keep blaming myself for my baby not being happy all of the time, I often blamed the only target left in the house – my husband. But once I admitted this to him (and to myself!) it helped us get back on the same parenting and marital page – most of the time.

    Here’s to not blaming ourselves or our partners for the emotional roller coaster of parenting and remembering that being a parent is hard – not because of anyone else but just because it is.

    Question: Research has shown that after having children, many couples actually have a decline in marital satisfaction. Do you agree or disagree?  Please share your answer below.

    Best,

    Heather

    heather@kiddybites.com

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      Heather Ouida: Heather co-founded babybites with business partner Laura Deutsch. Heather was a learning specialist where she taught in London for many years as well as at The Dalton School in Manhattan. Heather holds a BA in psychology from Hobart and William Smith Colleges, an MA in child development form Tufts University and acquired her learning specialist degree form York University in England. Heather currently resides in Manhattan her husband, two boys, two fish and pet turtle. Heather’s hobbies include, hot yoga, Nutella eating, writing, Bravo watching, reading and sharing inappropriate jokes with girl friends.
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