Worry: the Bain of my Existence

Worry. Worry sets in as soon as your child is conceived and only grows stronger once your little one arrives. Unfortunately, just as love manifests, so does your stress level.  At least for me, anyway.

And as much as I love living in New York City, there are things I worry about when thinking about my little girls (my babies!) growing up here. For instance, at what age is it appropriate for your child to take the subway by his/herself? To walk to the corner deli, or to school or a friend’s home on their own?  When can I unleash my child on this city and not worry constantly about her until she returns? 

The worst part of all this is that I have no answers, but I can imagine a few… it all depends on the child, right? You know when you know. Or, you never stop worrying, but you must trust that you’ve taught your child to make smart decisions, to be savvy, to be constantly aware of everything around them. If you’ve done your job right, then you won’t have to worry.  At least not as much.

And I can almost get behind that. Except then I think about Leiby Kletzky, the young Orthodox Jewish boy from Brooklyn who was kidnapped and murdered on his way home from school, all because he got turned around and stopped to ask directions. And I want to scream and cry and rage at the world because what happened to Leiby isn’t FAIR and life should not be so brutal. And because his parents did everything right.

I am so thankful that there is plenty of time before my little girls will be headed out the door without the watchful eye of me and my husband. And in that time, I hope to raise them with a sense of wonderment about the world, but also keep them grounded in reality. To be aware of their surroundings, but not fearful. To be strong and confident in their own skin. And at the end of the day, that is all I can hope for, really.

My daughter is two years old and we’ve started teaching her to look both ways before we cross the street. To watch for the little man that lights up green. To understand that green means “go” and red means “stop.” The first step on the long road of raising our child so she can venture out on her own into this great city of ours.

Here are some helpful resources I’ve found:

Kidpower – this charitable educational non-profit’s mission is to teach people of all ages, especially children, to use their power to stay safe, act wisely and believe in themselves. Helpful resources.

The Polly Klaas Foundation – this national nonprofit dedicated to the safety of all children, the recovery of missing children and public policies that keep children safe in their communities.  This link will send you to information on sending away for a free child safety kit.


Mama to a newborn & toddler, Ellen Schmidt has called NYC home for the last 11 years. While living here as a parent is a much different experience from that of a single gal or newlywed, NYC still captures her heart every day. Currently attempting the balancing act that is family & career, you can find Ellen blogging about all of that & more at Baby Meets City.


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