What is the best way to tell a sibling they are having a new baby brother/sister?

You asked and you shall now receive. It’s only fair for us to share all of this stored up knowledge about having a baby and what is going on with your body during those nine (really ten) months. We now will answer, in a very public forum, all of those burning questions about having a baby. Each Monday, we will tackle a commonly-asked-question from the point of view of an expectant parent. Chiming in to give her feedback will be three women who have been there and done that: an expert (you know someone who does this for a living), a mom from our community (for the “best” friend advice you need) and a Mommybites’ team member (someone who will promise to give you the REAL deal and no fluff). Earmark, share and add your own input to today’s question; it’s good karma.

What is the best way to tell a sibling they are having a new baby brother/sister?

Expert: Renee Sullivan

Sometimes – the sibling informs us – as did one of the moms in our support groups – the sibling actually “ordered up” a little baby sister – hold the fries mom. For those of us not so lucky to be able to have a tyke request received and willingly fulfilled, there are wonderful books that encourage the discussion of the new family. Its quite helpful to have your child be part of the process, and to be able to follow along on your pregnancy journey – bonding with your baby bump. One of my faves – My New Baby and Me – a wonderful interactive book for the older brother or sister to record their new baby sibling’s exciting first year.

Mom: Erica Siena

Since this is my first, I have not had the opportunity to figure out
my best way to tell a sibling; however, I have a 15-month old nephew. Whenever we get together, my brother and sister-in-law point to my belly and simply tell him that his little cousin is inside and tell him that it is his job to help take care of him. Sometimes he pats my belly. It is very cute. I think as long as the older child feels included and special, then there should be no jealousy.

babybites’ team: Laura Deutsch

I feel like this depends on the age of the sibling. I can only speak from my experience. When I found out I was expecting baby number 2, my daughter was just shy of 2 years old. Since I knew it would be hard for her to really understand a baby in my belly without seeing a big belly, I waited until I was noticeably pregnant before I told her. I told her there was a baby growing inside my belly and she was going to be a big sister. I also bought a bunch of books about being a big sister and read those to her and always referred back to the baby in mommy’s tummy.

About our team:

Renee Sullivan

Renee Sullivan, parent coach and Mommybites support group director, works with moms each week to create their own personal parenting plan that is right for them, while making sure that each mom gets the support, resources, and community they need for their parenting journey. Drawing from her experience as an birth coach and educator, she guides moms – new, seasoned and expectant through the never – ending array of decisions that come with having a child. Before joining Mommybites, she narrowly escaped the trenches of Corporate America where she was a Senior Project Manager for The New York Times, Morgan Stanley, and Pfizer. She lives in New York City and is the mom of one happy kindergartener.

Erica Siena

Hi! My name is Erica Siena and I am here to answer all of your Expecting Mom questions. As an expecting mom myself, I am due December 14 with my first child, I understand that this time is exciting yet often confusing. Also, as both a trusts and estates lawyer and Pilates instructor as well as as a member of the New York Junior League, Mount Sinai Young Friends, and my Barnard class Treasurer, I understand how stressful this time can be, how there doesn’t seem to be enough hours in a day, how I could possibly handle all the paparazzi stress for 9 months just for society to allow me a personal assistant. I hope to be able to answer all of your questions for you.

Laura Deutsch

Laura Deutsch is the original founder and creator of babybites. Since first starting babybites in 2006 by handing out post cards to fellow moms on the streets of Manhattan, Laura has continued to use her business savvy, dedication and creativity to cultivate and grow babybites in its flagship city of Manhattan. Prior to founding babybites, Laura worked as a middle school math teacher at The Dwight School in Manhattan. Laura holds her BA from Binghamton University and her MA in Early Childhood Education from Hunter College. She currently resides in Summit, NJ, with her husband, Brian, daughter, Ava, and son, Jacob.