Parenthood overwhelmingly revolves around moms in most cultures and societies. It has long been thought that bonding with mother (not father) is essential to baby’s development. Yet, some recent research has shown that primary school children scored higher in tests of empathy when they had formed a bond with their father during infancy. And while mothers have always been the nurturer, fathers help to develop skills in problem solving and socialization through their more boisterous style of play. Studies have shown that the more involved the father is in a family, the stronger sense of self the children develop – and the more nurturing the father is, the less aggression there is from the children – especially boys, though new research is demonstrating that a strong, supportive male figure has a positive impact on girls success in the teen years as well.
In traditional Asian culture, men are more dominant yet the family structure is central – focus is on the unit, rather than on individuals and independence. In traditional tribal cultures, men are the hunters while women are the caretakers and homemakers.
In the United States – at least on the East coast, and specifically in NYC – there has been a recent development of several dad groups. More and more stay-at-home or work-at-home dads are attending “mommy & me” classes and monthly “meet-ups.” Sometimes there are programs set up specifically for dads and their little ones. Other times, it’s dad that is available to take baby to the programs even if most of the other grown-ups are moms or nannies.
In addition to families with active dads, there are single parents, blended families, and other non-traditional families and in some homes, grandparents are the primary caregivers; in others, two moms or two dads are finding their specific roles in parenthood and childrearing.
As noted by another mom blogger, D. Hanousek of “Confessions of a San Fransisco Parent”: Dads are awesome. The world is changing and parenting roles aren’t immune. It’s time to get over mommy-centric thinking and celebrate all parents.
Personally, I am eternally grateful to my husband. Because of his support, I was able to start my own business. Due to our close relationship, he can sense when I need him to take over. We both work outside of our homes and we share the responsibilities within the home. There are definitely certain things our kids come to me for, and other things that really require daddy. From day one, he has been actively involved in their day to day routine, providing role modeling, love, and lots of playtime.
Daddy Time… like tummy time, it makes baby stronger.
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