I want to discipline my child, but I don’t like how it feels. I don’t want to upset my child, but I know I have to start sometime
Here is the secret to discipline: think about it as it is really meant to be. Discipline is meant to teach life lessons, to instill the idea that choices have consequences – some great, some not. Discipline is not about fear and yelling and taking everything that your child loves away forever and ever and ever.
Start small. Your child throws a car and you told him not to because it is unsafe? Take that car away. He does it again? Put the cars away, but play with something else. Your child will get angry and probably throw an epic tantrum. Stand strong. It is OK for your child to be mad/sad.
We do not want to rob our children of the experience of feeling all that life has to offer. It is hard to watch, but you want your child to understand that actions have reactions, and that it’s okay be sad/mad. We then move on and all is well. The idea is that the consequence is connected to the offense, and that your child is the one in control of his day. If he does not want to lose the car, he will learn not to throw the car.
Discipline is important because most behaviors are not grown out of and only get bigger as your child does. You will also find that you will be less angry, as you will not have held your tongue and actions only to yell and scream and over-react in the end.
The last piece is this… DO NOT HOLD A GRUDGE. Stay calm and be clear when implementing the consequence. And when it is over, it is over. No need to hold on to those angry feelings all day.
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Brandi Davis, ACC, is a professional Parenting Coach, Parent Educator, and Author of O.K. I’m A Parent Now What? She can also be found on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and be sure to catch her parenting podcasts on iTunes. The goal of Brandi’s practice is to bring respect, calm communication, teamwork, and FUN into the home or classroom. To discover all that Child and Family Coaching can bring to your family stop by www.childandfamilycoaching.com.
The views and opinions expressed on this blog are purely the blog contributor’s. Any product claim, statistic, quote or other representation about a product or service should be verified with the manufacturer or provider. Writers may have conflicts of interest, and their opinions are their own.