By Luke Hermann, M.D. & Tara Summers Hermann, R.N., B.S.N., Authors of Baby MEDBASICS®
From the moment the invitation arrived, my son Beckett could not stop talking about Jake’s Justice League birthday party. He knew what present he would give (Batman figure), what costume he would wear (Batman) and what he wished for in his goody bag (anything Batman). He was excited and rightly so as this superhero themed birthday party did not disappoint. Jen, the birthday boy’s mom is no party planning virgin, however there was one new detail she had to factor into this party; a life-threatening allergy. Her 10 month old son, John had recently been diagnosed with a severe peanut allergy so the party planning was a tricky balance between John’s safety and Jake’s wishes.
And speaking of Jake’s wishes, did I mention Jen hired actors, dressed as super heroes? The Justice League for hire crew dazzled us with amazing super powers and incredible fighting skills, taking the party from cool to epic in the minds of 15 costumed 4 year olds. Little did I know, the Justice League’s performance would soon be upstaged by the real-life fighting skills of two mothers. It went down like this — guest mom unwrapped a slightly melted, slightly smushed peanut butter energy bar and handed it to her two year old daughter. With the laser focus of Superman and the speed of Flash, Jen appeared out of seemingly nowhere. She explained that her baby has a severe peanut allergy, requested the daughter not eat the bar at the party and asked that both mom and child wash their hands. Guest mom refused. Her rationale? “Well, I’m sorry that your son is allergic to peanuts, but my daughter is NOT. It’s not fair that she can’t have her snack because of your son.” The two protective mamas went back and forth with verbal barbs that quickly escalated to physical contact. (No joke, it was kind of nuts — pun intended).
In some weird way it’s fitting that this “mom fight” occurred at a Justice League themed party. The JL heroes with their unique gifts and powers work together to protect those who can’t protect themselves. As mothers we have the opportunity to form our own Justice League- heroes (mamas) with unique gifts and powers, working together to protect the babies and toddlers who can’t protect themselves. In the U.S., there are 3 million children with food allergies and that number is climbing. Strict avoidance of the allergy-causing food or substance is the only way to avoid a reaction, which is why it is so important that we create a community of support for these families. So at the next birthday party, play date or pre-school event, don your superhero costume and know there are simple ways you can help.
Here’s a quick list of protective actions you can start implementing today.
1. I totally believe if you understand the “why” behind the request, you will find it easier to grant. So begin with a crash course, Allergies 101. The Food Allergy and Anaphylaxis Network’s website (http://www.foodallergy.org/) is a great place to start. Take 5 minutes and learn how to recognize and manage allergic reactions to food. Know when and how to use an Epi-pen because you may be the only “hero” in the room who knows how.
2. Always ask in advance if there are food allergies you should know about. This goes for party’s, play dates, preschools and daycares too.
3. Even trace amounts of a food allergen can cause a reaction so before you prepare food, read ingredient labels carefully. Not sure? Confused by the label? That’s okay, you can call the manufacturer for information or better yet, just serve something else.
As I was leaving the party I was genuinely trying to understand both sides of the argument, but my heart went out to Jen. For those of us whose children do not suffer from a severe food allergy, it is virtually impossible to truly understand the worry that accompanies that diagnosis. But, that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t try to follow the Rule as Golden as Wonder Woman’s boomeranging tiara, “Treat other people (and their kids) the way you wish to be treated”. Do the things you would want people to do if it was your child’s life at risk. Jen joked as we walked out the door that she should have dressed as Green Lantern (GL’s ring creates a protective, life-supporting force field) but the truth was, she didn’t need his ring, she was protecting John herself through education, preparation and vigilance. Who says super heroes aren’t real?
Author Bios
Luke Hermann, M.D. & Tara Summers Hermann, R.N., B.S.N., authors of Baby MEDBASICS®, founded the company MEDBASICS® LLC. They live in New York City with their three children, Nicholas, Oliver Beckett, and Vivienne.
For more information please visit http://babymedbasics.com and Amazon.com, and follow the author on Facebook and Twitter