A few weeks ago, Mommybites received an email from a woman in Auckland, New Zealand, named Paige Walker. In this email, she shared her touching story of finding out that her then 8-year-old daughter had been sexually abused by her best friend’s husband. As a “survivor mother” she decided to write a book about her experiences, as she felt it was important that the trauma, pain and suffering that mothers often go through is validated and given a voice.
As awareness and prevention is an issue to which Mommybites is dedicated, we thought it was important to share her story, which Paige Walker writes about in her book, The Broken Road.
The Broken Road (Review from Paige’s blog)
Many accounts have been documented of the atrocities inflicted upon our children, but little is known or documented of the ripple effect it has on the mother and family as a whole and on so many levels. Registered nurse and Kiwi mum, Paige Walker, finds out how sexual abuse does not discriminate between class, gender, race, ethnicity or religious backgrounds, and that most abusers are known to the family – as Paige found out.
The Broken Road takes you on an emotional journey over a three year period from a mother’s perspective of her struggle to cope with the magnitude of her daughter’s disclosure, to her trauma and the devastating aftermath that sexual abuse leaves behind.
It moves through the pain and suffering of having to deal with the betrayal of her friends, the multidisciplinary agencies involved in such a case, the stress of going through the court system and giving witness against her so-called friends. It details her courageous fight for her daughter and the inspiring account of her recovery as she refers herself to a Drug and Alcohol Rehabilitation Service to detox from the Benzodiazepine – and the horrific withdrawals she experienced while doing so.
Finally, it reflects on how broken lives can be rebuilt through love, compassion and the gift of forgiveness, as she finally realized that acceptance and forgiveness of her daughter’s perpetrator was the only way forward to overcome her demons and be able to have a life beyond what was her Broken Road.
Her daughter is now aged 11 and, after dealing with her grief, pain and self-loathing, is enjoying a full life once again – though the scars and memories will always remain. She is still in counselling, supported by her mother and therapist as she now faces the challenges of puberty while her healing continues.
The Broken Road is believed to be the first documented account of the effects of child sexual abuse from a mother’s perspective in New Zealand. Its aim is to create an awareness of child sexual abuse and the affect it has on the parents and family as a whole.
Paige Walker currently resides in New Zealand with her daughter. She is advocating on behalf of mothers, highlighting the effects of child sexual abuse. She encourages parents to make themselves aware of the signs of abuse, as early disclosure and getting the help and support is paramount to the emotional and psychological healing of the child and parents.
You can find more info about The Broken Road here:
http://www.thebrokenroadbook.com/
http://www.xlibris.co.nz/bookstore/bookdisplay.aspx?bookid=700096
