My toddler is becoming disrespectful. Her go-to response for me is yelling and rudeness. What can I do about this? I want her to express herself but frankly, I also want her to stop yelling at me.
Ahhh, that fine line between empowerment and a tiny screaming gremlin. The first thing to do is chill the situation. Have your daughter calm down: “I am happy to hear what you have to say, but please say it calmly.” “You can disagree with me, but please do not yell at me.”
You may have to give her the tone and words that you are looking for. It can be hard for kids to switch gears in a flash, so a little guidance is helpful. Also, be clear that while you do want to hear her words and feelings, if she continues to yell at you, you will have to walk away (if it is safe) or end the conversation.
If this is something that has become a constant, a reaction for the action is in order. A consequence: “I want to take you to the museum, but I don’t want to take someone who is yelling at me to the museum.” “I want you to be able to watch the movie with us, but if you continue to yell at everyone and speak in unkind ways, I will have to excuse you.” (put her to bed, in her room, somewhere she can be safe and occupied).
It CAN be tough when faced with a strong-toned child. You want to teach your kids to speak their minds, but you also want them to do so in productive ways. With a little guidance, you can mentor a person who can express themselves thoughtfully.
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Brandi Davis, ACC, is a professional Parenting Coach, Parent Educator, and Author of O.K. I’m A Parent Now What? She can also be found on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and be sure to catch her parenting podcasts on iTunes. The goal of Brandi’s practice is to bring respect, calm communication, teamwork, and FUN into the home or classroom. To discover all that Child and Family Coaching can bring to your family stop by www.childandfamilycoaching.com.
The views and opinions expressed on this blog are purely the blog contributor’s. Any product claim, statistic, quote or other representation about a product or service should be verified with the manufacturer or provider. Writers may have conflicts of interest, and their opinions are their own.
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