My child says “WHY” all of the time. All the time. “Please, put your shoes on.” “Why?” “Because we are going to the playground.” “Why?” “Because you like the playground.” “Why?” “Arrrggh…I know kids do this, but it is killin’ me. What to do?”
Yes, those 2- and 3-year-olds are inquisitive ones. Some truly are looking for answers, some want you to change your mind (enough whys and they will wear you down and get that cookie), some just want to rile you up.
So, what to do? Here are a few tips:
Question back.
- “Why do I have to put on shoes?” “You tell me. Why we are putting on shoes.” “So we can go to the park.”
- “Why do I have to brush my teeth?” “Why do you think?” “So I wont get cavities.”
When you ask them for their thoughts, they often have the answer and it is less aggravation for you since you do not have to explain and explain and explain. Also, the WHY will stop there.
Answer once and end the conversation.
- Supporting curiosity is a must when it comes to kids, but sometimes you just have to end the conversation, especially if it is going nowhere. “It is time to take a bath.” “WHY?” “Because I need you to be clean before bed.” “WHY?” “I was clear, it is bath time I will not discuss it further.”
- “You need to clean up please.” WHY?” “Because it is time for dinner and I would like the toys away before dinner.” “WHY?” “I was clear, you can come to dinner whenever you are done cleaning. The rest of us will be at dinner and are excited for you to join us when you are done.” This is especially good to use when you know the WHY is a stall tactic.
You know what I am talking about.
Ask the child to repeat the answer back.
This strategy is to be used before the WHY. “I need you to get dressed because it is time for school. Why do I need you to get dressed?” “So I can go to school.” This makes sure the child hears and processes your request. It is also hard to WHY something that you just said the answer to.
This stage does not last forever, but while it exists it can be exhausting. Stay calm, be clear, and try some of these strategies.
Like what you read? Sign up for our free newsletter so you can be informed of the latest FREE webinars & teleclasses, parenting articles, & weekly raffles.
Brandi Davis, ACC, is a professional Parenting Coach, Parent Educator, and Author of O.K. I’m A Parent Now What? She can also be found on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and be sure to catch her parenting podcasts on iTunes. The goal of Brandi’s practice is to bring respect, calm communication, teamwork, and FUN into the home or classroom. To discover all that Child and Family Coaching can bring to your family stop by www.childandfamilycoaching.com.
The views and opinions expressed on this blog are purely the blog contributor’s. Any product claim, statistic, quote or other representation about a product or service should be verified with the manufacturer or provider. Writers may have conflicts of interest, and their opinions are their own.
